Silas Scrum and the Time Keeper

Silas Scrum, the keeper of things, lived alone in a dark, dank, and cobweb-filled hole in the side of a tree. He liked it that way. One crisp autumn day, Silas encountered a very unusual dwelling. “Good morning, who are you, and what is your function?” asked Silas.

“I am Mertaught, the Time Keeper, and my function is to keep time in order,” said the strange-looking man.

“Hmm, let me see, watchmaker, clock winder, town crier. Nope, there’s nothing in my book about a Time Keeper. How will the Lord Chamberlin tax you if I can’t find a spot for you in my book?” grumbled Silas.

“Tax me? My good man, I am he who reads the Nor’s threads and sends the Grimm Reaper to collect his due when your time is up?” questioned Mertaught.

“Look, I don’t know any Nors or a reaper named Grimm, but I do know that I must collect these things and put them in my book, or else the Lord Chamberlin will tan my hide,” snapped the keeper of things.

“No, No, you’re failing to take in the importance of what I am saying here. Look, you can’t tax me as if I were a shopkeeper. You can’t tax me at all,” said the Time Keeper.

“Well, I can slide you in next to the watchmaker as a clock repairman; that’ll cost you two bits. Will that be alright with you?” asked Silas.

“Oh bother,” said Mertaught, then pulled out his purse and handed Silas the coins.

“You have a great day, Mr. Mertag. I will be sure to stop by next month to collect for the orphan’s fund, toot-a-loo,” said the keeper of things, then walked down the path, searching for another thing to place in his book.